Am I?

on Monday, December 7, 2009

I am an individual and as long we don't go into the problem of existence or not, I consider this to be an indisputable fact (which means it's not indisputable, but never mind). But is this individual a pure 'me'? How much is formed by society?
I would like (or I don't really like to say it, I just feel as I must because it is what I believe) to say that I'm entirely a product of my environment, that is, my society, in the broad definition.
My genes comes from my parents and while the biggest part of my genome is a mix of theirs, except for a few unique changes from chromosomal crossovers.
Does this apply to my mind as well? Am I simply a social construction? I fear to say it but yes, I think this might be the case. It scares me, but where else would I have gotten my ideas from if not my context? Thin air? A soul? All my ideas are either someone else's or a response to it.
I am a phenotype and a genotype.
I often notice in myself how I seem to be programmed to feel certain things. If I help someone self-lessly, I get happy. Is it because I have been formed this way or because conscience is a quality all humans are born with? Would a person raised entirely without any encouragement to help anyone but themselves get any happiness in helping someone else?
So, what is there in me that is individual? My thumb print, my iris, my genes.
I want more than anything else believe that I am more than biological and since I believe in God, that is possible. No, I could believe in a soul without believing in God, but it makes more sense to me to be able to base it in a belief in a higher being with another type of control over the world than I have. Because then when I am asked where I started I say God. And they ask me, where did God start but I can say that it is a mystery beyond me, since I can't think eternity and dismiss the question easily.
And suddenly I find myself here, on the subject of the existence of God and souls, from having started of in Mill and individuality. I am way off, I don't actually have any other thoughts than the one's I've come up with myself in defense of my beliefs.

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